corrected the mistake

never too late

Friends, it seems like the posts will be coming to an end now. He does not wish for more of his actions to be documented like such. 

I thank you, readers. Only one of you seemed to have helped me during this conflict. But that's okay, as He is all I need now that he has opened his arms ready to embrace me. There were others in the way, misleading me, telling me to stay away, but I found the right path. I chose the right path.

I should finish this post. If any friends or family ever happen to come across this, I am sorry you had to experience me go through this. In the end, it was all for the best. 

He is standing over my shoulder right now as I type this. He is soothing me. It is like a massage. It is greater than a massage. 

.s.dpthemistakeiscorrected

itisdone

He left the room, it depresses me to see Him go, but I know he's with me still. Somebody just knocked at my front door, wonder who it is. Maybe it's mother. She said she was out getting help. Don't know what that help could be. I'm obviously doing very well at the moment. Going to go answer the door.

June 9th 2011: At peace

i am content now.

not entirely torched 

but

close enough

you have done well

thank you

School is finally over. I am at peace now. For at least the next three months.

It took me a while to realize it, but He has helped me. Since the beginning, although I did not know it, He helped me. with His guidance I gradually learned to understand school in a way I prefer.

years of wishing

He finally came to me

finally

He is part of me, and not part of me. He has guided me even when He could not be with me physically. with His presence I am able to get away

get away from it all

get away with it

nobody's stopping me-,svj us

it is finished

no

one final deserved post for this small audience

okay

June 8th 2011: I have had it

The doctors diagnosed me with schizophrenia

School is no place forsf asmfe iyes it is

Let me recite a conversation I overheard today when I was in the cafeteria, with the other students who exempted their 5th period final.

I'm not sitting by my friends,  because my friends didn't exempt any exams. Although I went to the table at which I usually sit at during lunch.

As usual, I began to draw, it was a parrot.
This small group of black girls were sitting at my table, next to me. They were loud speakers, so I could overhear the ignorant conversation they had.

"Hey, look at dem white kids ova der!" The more weighty, fat one said. Pointing towards the group of ESE students, the mentally-retarded students.

"Man they're the ESE kids! Why they exemptin' finals? Dem retards." The other, thinner member of the group said. I was drawing still, but I began to not be aware of what I was drawing, I was listening in on their conversation.

"Man I kill myself if my kids were retarded." The fat one said.

"Hell I'd kill them!" The thin one uttered.

The group laughed. They... Laughed.... What is wrong with them? Why... Why would they say something like that? Those... Those... I don't want to use the word, I really don't... But... They they they

They deserve to be called it. Those... Those fucking niggers
THOSE FUCKING NIGGERS. I don't care if it's considered a racist term, I know I'm not racist. I know I'm not. I'm not. I really am not.

This is why I hate school
This is why I wish I could do something about it
This is why I will do something about it
This is why

Other instances have caused me to hate school, but I have never felt this way about school. Yes, it's just the students in this instance. But it's the fact these ignoramuses are being catered to in this supposed place for academic achievement and all that other bullshit. It's the fucking last week of school and they haven't been changed. Why don't they teach us useful thigns? why don't rthey

The grading, the people, the corruption, the rfausgihaudgbf chhhln3v vxkxchbbbbbbbdd
Idasf I needed somebody, someone, or somdfething to teach school a lesson. My guardian angel, yes that's him. He sees me. He watches over me. He protects me.

I saw Sophie again today. She thought I was crazy, listening to me ramble about things; just things. She was becoming scared of my plan. She and I agreed that it was best to break up. So I did, I broke her up. I broke her up into t

Tomorrow is the last day of school. There are finals I'm meant to be taking tomorrow. I won't be taking them. I'm not exempting them. There will be at least one or two more posts tomorrow. Then I'm finished.

June 3rd 2011: Craziness

Today has been the most eventful school day this year.

Where to begin?

We were collecting our locks from the locker-room to turn them in, I went to my locker and opened the lock. I was about to just take the lock and leave, but I noticed there was something inside my locker. It was my iPhone. I've never put anything inside my locker before. Don't recall telling anyone my lock number, either. The iPhone was completely dead though, I'm charging it as I type this.

Then I turned in my text books, and went to lunch. Less than 15 minutes into lunch, I was seated at the table I usually sit at with my friends. I didn't have any food, so I was just chilling, as people would say. My eyes were directed to the left of me, on the technically right-side of the cafeteria, and I see a milk carton thrown across like four tables. Seconds after I see other various types of food being thrown across the tables, then it erupted into a food fight of epic proportions, although it only lasted like 40 seconds before students started running out. I got hit with a cup of corn, I left the war-zone with no damaging wounds, unlike those unfortunates who were stricken with a hard orange.

So the security guards got everybody to evacuate the students. No more than 5 minutes after they got all the students outside, a fight between a security guard and a student broke out. I shit you not. So many students were suspended today.

The next three periods mainly entailed of students talking about the food-fight.
But that's not all.

In geography, the last 5 minutes of class, shit happened. Some girl's nail polish bottle broke, staining her backpack. The nail polish spread across the floor, somehow. Our teacher is a nagging bitch when it comes to classroom messes. When there were paper scraps on the floor left from the class before, she acted like it was a goddamn dead body. When she saw the nail polish spread across the floor, she flipped. She kept us inside after the late bell.

For fuck's sake. What a friday. I thought this was a high school, not an elementary school.
I'm going to be spending my weekend studying for finals... Fun.

Update

Shit, I haven't been on this in a month. Sorry, if anybody has actually noticed.
My iPhone got stolen, so I wasn't able to record anything. It's still gone...

My mother has been trying to limit computer usage because she thinks my recent displays of nervousness and paranoia has been because of my time on the internet, she says I should stop going to creepy websites and wikis. I don't remember looking at many creepy websites.

I've been hearing the voices again.
returnreturnreturnreturnreturnreturnonelastvisit
Just over and over again, in my mind.

It's a shame I wasn't able to transfer the video of me going through the children's books before it got stolen, I admit it got put off for a couple of days. I'm lazy like that. Sophie has slowly been drifting apart from me. Not me drifting away from her, but her drifting away from me. It's making me sad. Idont like it.

There's one more week until school is over, then summer begins. This week has been mostly finals cramming. My finals are on the last week of school. How fantastic. I wasn't able to exempt any of them, unfortunately. My grades are too atrocious.

Anyway, sorry about the lack of posts... Who am I kidding. You guys probably could care less about me. I'm just a crazy 16 year-old who wants to be a wrirtere nad abecomea filmakerd
nobofdhy atakes credence to dthe face that i am Short
that i'm a little weird
I'm intelligent compared to these other ignorant fucks... I don't like school because it own't teach me things i WANT to leanr

Rather, I am quite sure that school has a genuine purpose for me. Although I may not realize it, it will soon come under the light, and I will see it. I am sure to be wrong, what I am saying right now.

May 4th 2011: Memories coming soon

Shit. I just went through the box. I feel so unnerved looking at all these old books. I kind of... regret giving them away. One of the books had me feeling really weird... Suppose you'll see when I upload the video. However it'll have to wait for tomorrow. Internet has been going on and off lately, and it'd piss me off greatly if my upload got really far and all of a sudden the internet dies out.

Also, just a heads up. I'll try my best to update daily (every day). I can't promise you guys that, but I'll do my best. Finals are coming up, and I really should start to do more of my work. Also, my sleep schedule is pretty messed up.

May 3rd 2011: Yesterday and Today

Yesterday (May 2nd) I was on my way to my friend's house. I was in my mom's car. We're about to drive by that forest I visited before. What happens? My mom's car just shuts off, and it seemed to park itself right on the sidewalk in front of the forest. My mom begins to search around the car to see what's wrong. She checks the engine, and I get out of the car. The forest seemed to be calling out to me.

"Don't go too far." My mom says, looking under the hood of our car.

I ventured deeper into the forest. Seemed like I needed to go deeper (Inception joke originally not intended.), so I did. I didn't have a headache, strangely. However my eyes did seem to flicker rapidly like an old light or something.

I didn't go too far. But as far as I did get, I found something just resting on a couple sticks. It was a box full of children's books. Labeled on the box (With sharpie, of course.) was "FINDMEMORIES". Inside the box, several children's books. They were the books I made my mom give away a couple days ago. And now they're back.

My mom eventually started to get the car up and running again as soon as I approached her with the box. I told her to just forget about my friend, and go home. I'm gonna go through the books soon.

Today. Or rather, yesterday (May 3rd), I started doing my work again. More of it, at least. Mrs. Rees made me draw what I was feeling. It was a rather strange outcome. If I have time and can get access to a scanner again, I'll try and scan it. Doubt you'd be able to read it well with iPhone's camera.

Until next time.